The Friction, Differences and Karma Meters: remember how perfect things seemed back in the beginning?
Or maybe you can't even recall those glorious early days, when the future looked rosy and the possibilities for your relationship seemed limitless.
What was it that broke the two of you up, anyway?
The answer to that question is complex and multilayered, to be sure.
Had you known what your relationship trouble spots were, then you could have been better prepared to take one of three routes; avoid them as best as you could, worked through them as a team, or decided it just wasn’t worth the trouble and move on.
Your Friction, Differences and Karma meters give you a quick, at-a-glance view of the strife in your previous relationship -- all the sources of irritation, stress and hostility that ultimately led to that final goodbye.
This information can help you come to terms with your breakup, but also make you aware of pitfalls you may encounter in the future.
7-10: Ouch -- you might still be bitter
4-6: You both knew which buttons to push
0-3: The Problem? A lack of passion.
7-10: You never got each other from day one.
4-6: Your differences were eye-opening... until they got annoying!
0-3: You could still be friends
7-10: It was doomed from the start.
4-6: Unconsciously, you both acted out old issues.
0-3: At least you made new mistakes instead of repeating old ones.
The two of you were hot, hot, hot. Mmm, everyone wanted some of what you had between you: sweaty, sticky, lovely lust. Your connection got physical fast, simply because neither of you could resist each other. Opposites attract, so they say, and in your case they were absolutely right, with the one's receptive energy meeting the other's force with explosive results. But there was (or should have been) life outside the bedroom, and you two didn't have very much of it. It could have been that one of you was using the other merely to slake a physical urge -- not a problem if both of you were in on the agreement, but nasty and painful if one of you was looking for love and the other just lust. One of you may also have been very jealous and possessive of the other as well. Had you extended your compatibility beyond the bedroom, things might have gone differently. Did you share interests in common? If not, you needed to develop some. You had to talk about your values, your hopes, your dreams. Being close on one level does not an emotional connection make; you needed to spend more time bonding and less time smooching. You've lots of love to give; in the future make sure it's on more than the physical plane.
You and your sweetie had a problem: You were both hotheaded. Easy to insult and quick to criticize, you fought over the silliest things, and pursued each battle to the death. Afterwards you turned the cold shoulder to your partner. The problem dynamics were at the very root of your pairing. Though your connection was passionate and intense, it was also inclined to tumult, since both of you tended to view a difference of opinion as a threat to your egos. In addition, you may have found yourself cursed with a curious compulsion to blurt out the most inappropriate things -- or a habit of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. You both needed to work at it if you wanted this one to be a go. You never melded together smoothly because you didn't put the time in. You should have scheduled regular appointments to sit down calmly and work on your issues. If the urge struck to have a rager, it would have been better to table the issue until your next meeting instead. If you could have gotten a little distance, gained a little perspective, you both could have learned to appreciate what the other had to give.
It was pitiful to see poor you in such a state, literally starved for love. Your so-called sweetie really held out on you, huh? Few people can resist your luscious siren charms, and thus you had gotten a bit spoilt with all the attention. So when this contained, precise person happened by, you figured that a little cool breeze might make for a refreshing change of pace, not to mention a challenge. And you got what you asked for -- one heck of a challenge. You broke under the strain, doing things you wouldn't have done if you were in your right mind, trying to get the stroking you deserved. But you shouldn't have been so quick to throw this one on the ash heap. For once you chose a lover who was not shiny on the surface but was solid to the core. You didn't have as much fun in this relationship as you have had in others, but you were on the road to a love relationship that demanded the best from you even while it gave you the kind of satisfaction that could have endured for a lifetime. You had the oatmeal of lovers, hardly glamorous but undeniably down-to-earth, dependable, and good for you. Maybe next time the path won't be quite so hard.
How often did you stare at your sweetie with a gaping jaw, wondering what on earth they were thinking? Misunderstandings haunted your pairing. Both of you meant well, but at times it seemed you were speaking different languages. And you, with your galloping ego, got all huffy puffy, fueling the friction that was always simmering between the pair of you. You raged. Your lover clammed up. A roaring silence stretched between you, both of you too stubborn to break the tension.But the power to fix this relationship was in your hands, had you wanted to. You picked yourself a mercurial, restless, enigmatic lover for a reason -- you found the challenge intriguing and sexy. You could have gone with it, learned to be comfortable with a bit of mystery. You were never going to wallow in perfect, contented understanding with your sweetie; instead you had an exciting lover who stirred you up. Argue and debate could have been a prelude to passion instead of letting your quibbles drive a wedge between you. You could have had something very, very hot, if only you were willing to forego serenity. Everything has its cost.
You were never a model of serene stability, but in this relationship your jitters were near-constant. Were you sleeping poorly? Eating junk food, or almost nothing at all? Craving cigarettes and other illicit substances? And hey, how were those dreams? Deep inside, you knew; Your love life had been going downhill for some time, and there was a reason. You chose yourself a lover who could meet you eye-to-eye intellectually, but who was a bit chilly. Whereas you reached out to the world with a rather playful and impish warmth, your lover was rather stern. If you were in a sitcom, you would have been the bratty little brother and your sweetie would have been the grouchy dad in the La-Z-Boy.On the plus side, your lover provided you with plenty of stimulation on every level. Much was demanded of you, and you had to work hard to deliver. This polished you, like a rock eroded by a powerful river. No one ever said growth was fun! And grow you did, though you remained insecure as to where your relationship was going. You were well-placed for the future if you could have engaged in meaningful communication.
What was the old Chinese proverb? May you live in exciting times, or something like that? What can you tell of exciting times, what with that great, frantic, scary sweetie you had grabbed hold of? The passion was something else, yes, oh yes, but the side-effects were brutal. You couldn't find your footing here, you were too well-aware of your lover's propensity for sudden upheaval. Life-changing decisions were made in an instant, and you were along for the ride, for good or for bad. It all left you feeling pretty insecure -- and perhaps even fearful that your lover may have had eyes for another. It could have been that you already had fidelity issues, and promises to do better next time didn't help you when your lover was so darn unpredictable.You had a wild ride with this one, but it was not without its pleasures. You were never bored, always wide awake and present for whatever you were handed. Trust in one thing: Your lover was never there merely for duty's sake. If you were getting plenty of attention, there was a reason why. You shouldn't have questioned or worried. You should have just laid back and enjoyed the goodies; this was one time it would have been better to feel than to think.
Romantic success seemed so tantalizingly close for you and your lover. But were you looking at things as they really were, or as you wished they were? There was something insubstantial in your pairing, something secret or unexpressed lurking right beneath the surface. Did one of you have issues from the past you'd never admitted or worked through? Was one of you up to something secretive and unhealthy? Whatever the issue was, it caused problems between you, problems you couldn't solve without owning up to exactly what was wrong.So you should have sat down together. Talked about your feelings. What were each of you looking for in your relationship? What was it you needed that you were not getting? And, most painfully, what parts of you did you fear were unlovable? It could have turned out that your fears and anxieties were not grounded in reality. And in any case, you would have had to let the real you be known if you were going to be loved and accepted. You didn't let your true self be seen. You feared that when you opened up you would be rejected. Your lover had tender regard for you; letting that love in to your private, bruised parts would have started a glorious healing process.
Acid burned in your stomach, your thoughts raced, your heart beat its way out of your chest -- were these the signals of the end of your relationship? Your lover had you entertaining a certain green-eyed monster, and it was awfully unsexy. Would you have wanted to come home to a lover who demanded that you account for your time? Not likely. But as much as you wanted to play it cool, your possessive attachment to your partner seemed to make it impossible. You viewed everyone your partner came near with suspicion; you even made embarrassing scenes in front of others. Not to mention how miserable you made things at home. So what was the key to smoothing your path? For starters, both of you needed to recommit to each other. Were you each where you wanted to be? Were you heading in a direction that both of you favored? Why were you with each other? Once you'd answered these questions, you could have started to formulate a plan for tackling your problems. You shouldn't have been afraid to start. After all, what you were doing wasn't working. Had you tried something new, broken out of your patterns, you might have created a passionate and equal future together.
You chose yourself such a sweet, loving lover -- why did you grow apart? You viewed everything from a distance, loved but not loving. Was it jealousy that hardened your heart? It's true that your sweetie was flirtatious and sensual; so different than you. It was their second nature to gather great groups of admirers. This didn't mean that you didn't have it all, just that there were so many people who envied you for what you had. But to a more serious, restrained person like you, it looked like your dear one was tweaking your green-eyed side on purpose.You needed to relax. Your mate was not one to sneak and betray. You bagged yourself a lover who was really in love -- with you, even though you weren't acting so adorably. You should have rewarded your sweetie's attentions with some romantic gestures of your own. Breakfast in bed? Tender massages? You needed to stop withholding your affection; everything you gave would have been returned to you. A little energy spent on physical pursuits and affection could have produced just the thaw between you that you were looking for. Next time, don't be quite to standoffish. Jump into the fray and you'll find it's a lot warmer in there.
Your love wasn't always pretty. What was once a delicious attachment collapsed in on itself. What happened? One of you forgot the old maxim about the need to let the things you love roam free. Insecurity led to jealousy, jealousy into attempts to control each other. Intense arguments flared, marked by middle-of-the-night discussions, slammed doors, raised voices. In the beginning you had fun together. But that all became a distant memory. But all did not have to be lost if you didn't want it to be. What was needed was a little balance and flexibility. You didn't choose a lover you could wrap up in a tidy little box. No, your lover was passionate and powerful; someone you could admire but not someone who was easy to live with. So you couldn't expect every aspect of your lives together to go just exactly as you'd have liked all the time. Your lover surprised you, and though that could be disconcerting, with the right mindset it could have been exhilarating. You were never bored, and that counted for a lot. You should have enjoyed your intense connection, because without it your life seems a lot more gray.
Why, oh, why did you and your lover keep finding yourselves in a bad place? You seemed stuck on a terrible treadmill. The pair of you pulled apart, came together, drifted away, circled back. You tired of repeating the same patterns. The chief problem you had with your sweetie was that you couldn't seem to find common ground. And it's true, you didn't have a lot in common -- you were driven while your lover was dreamy, you wanted to stride through the world making big changes, while your lover was more apt to dawdle and drift.But why should you have expected any different when you were the architect of this awkwardness? You were attracted to your lover because of your differences, not in spite of them. Your lover wanted you to slow down a little, to appreciate the subtle and magical rather than just the here and now. In your arrogance you wanted to force your sweetie to see things from your perspective, but that was shortsighted. You needed to bend a little and listen to someone else for a change. You may have found you had a lot to learn about life, not to mention your lover.
There's glue, and then there's glue. Elmer's versus epoxy, Velcro versus nails. Your relationship was bound by the easy-to-separate type of togetherness, not the wild-horses-couldn't-drag-us-apart variety. Now, don't misunderstand: This is not to say that there was not a strong connection between you. But you were able to take the occasional separate vacation; to enjoy your own interests without your partner feeling threatened; to be two distinct individuals who chose to hang out together. Compare this to the joined-at-the-hip, can't-bear-to-be-apart couple. Didn't you always wonder about them? What did they think would happen if they weren't together for an entire evening, much less a day or even a week?Separation was not a problem for you two; in fact, you may have done it by choice on a regular basis. After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder, and this was surely true of you and your partner. You took great joy in sharing your individual experiences, as well as in spending time together. If anything, you might have had to make it a point to schedule in time to be together! You may each have been involved in your own orbits that you suddenly realized that days or even weeks had gone by without you two sharing a full day together.You shouldn't have let that happen. You needed to discover the challenges of your relationship, which so often can turn out to be opportunities for growth and development. You two had chosen to be together, and likewise, you could have chosen to grow together.
I hope you have enjoyed the valuable insight, wisdom and guidance of this astrology report. You might be a little curious about astrology and perhaps wondering how an astrologer can know so much about you!
Astrology is a mathematical system. It's all about applying meaning to numbers, or more specifically, finding meaning in the movements of the planets around the Sun, as viewed from our perspective here on earth. These planetary movements are easily captured and recorded with measurements, calculations, angles and so on.
That's why astrology works so well with computers, whose programs are also based on numbers and formulas. In 'the old days' -- thousands of years ago, when astrology was first recorded -- those early astrologers had to painstakingly observe the heavens and catalog their observations for the next generation of astrologers to build upon. Thank goodness for the computer age! Now we can simply use computers to make those calculations quickly and pull just the applicable pieces of information. Now, astrology is instant, based upon thousands of years of observations obtained through careful methodology.
Interpretations of planetary positions are based in part on ancient Greek and Roman mythology, but your astrological report is unique, describing you and you only. Even in the case of twin siblings, their birth charts differ from each other's in at least a few ways. And besides, no one amounts to just a simple interpretation of their birth chart; everyone's personality is complex. Your astrological report leaves plenty of room for variations based on your free will, personal growth and transformation over a lifetime.
Just like you, your astrological report is unique. It’s generated online in seconds and provides you with instant insight at your fingertips. Whether you have a pressing question about your future or you just want some guidance and direction, now you can have it all -- in a fast, focused, all-about-you format.
You can choose from several different types to find the report that's right for you and your needs. Your natal report is all about you -- your unique characteristics, strengths, weaknesses, potential and so on. Compatibility reports analyze the connections between two different people, to see how well and in what ways they get along. And a forecast is based on where the planets are today and how they're affecting you, uniquely. Be sure to try a free sample of another report to find out more about you!
Continue your personal evolution with another Kelli Fox Astrology report!
I’m so glad to be a part of your journey to self-discovery and alignment with your planetary destiny. Please let me know if you have any questions about this product or your next steps.
P.S. Are you hooked and excited to learn more? Follow the links below for (free!) real-time astrology updates, daily horoscopes, personalized information, and more- all from Kelli Fox!